His & Her

I've been MIA - lots to do, ILs staying to help with kids this week because my Mum is doing jury service, shouldn't really blog at work etc.....

But Hannah tagged me with this meme which looked quite fun. :-) And it's our wedding anniversary tomorrow too.

1. What is his name? Rod (Rodney actually but not many people call him that). I call him "sweetie". DS thought that was his real name for a while. ;-)

2. Who eats more? Him.

3. Who said, “I love you” first? Um.. not sure actually. I know he said, "I really, really like you Pen" first so perhaps that was it. (Heh heh)

4. Who is taller? Him - I'm 1.65m and he's about another 10-15cm taller

The next question seems to have vanished somewhere in cyberspace, but Hannah/Teeni made up her own one so I’ll copy her …

5. Who drives most when you are out together? He does.

6. Who is more sensitive? Me!

7. Who does the laundry? Me again.

8. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? Me again. I can't remember how we worked that one out. We bought out bed prior to getting married (the first purchase together apart from the rings) and he slept in it at the flat before I got there so we must have had a discussion about "sides" but I don't remember exactly.

9. Who pays the bills? Mostly me, but that was because I was at home more. Probably now it will be a mixture.

10. Who cooks more? Me. He can cook but doesn't. I should ask him to do more in that area.

11. Who is more stubborn? Oh him definitely. Man. I think it's a Dugmore thing. Seems like most of the males on his side are like it! Little daughter has inherited it too... going to make it interesting for her partner.

12. Who is the first to admit they are wrong? Me. I can't stand it if there is bad feeling. So I say sorry even when it's not my fault. (See 11).

13. Who has more siblings? Me - I have 2 younger sisters. He has 1 older sister.

14. Who wears the pants in the relationship? Hmmm... I defer to him in many things but we do make big decisions together. We also defer to each other's expertise where necessary. Of us both I am probably the "stronger" but when I'm not myself (e.g. the first 6 weeks after DS was born I was a bit of an emotional hormonal wreck) he can step up to the plate and be there.

15. What do you like to do together? You really want to know? *snort* Okay... BK (before kids) we did a lot of tramping type activities and we still like to do things like that. Both of us have an interest in nature, science and related things. Both of us like to read, do stuff on the 'puter, eat and drink nice food. We also have individual hobbies that complement each other e.g. he likes photography, I like scrapbooking. I wish we'd had opportunity to travel before we had kids but the old bio-clock was ticking. We do the garden together much to his sister's amusement because she could never persuade him to help her do gardening. Ahh the power of lurve. ;-)

16. Who eats more sweets? He does. He's a sucker (pun intended) for marshmallows.

17. Guilty Pleasures? hee hee!

18. How did you meet? He was boarding in a basement flat belonging to some of our friends from church. They introduced us in a sense. I'd know who he was for ages but never actually talked or approached him.

19. Who asked whom out first? He did. I blogged about it here. Totally surprised me! :-) And my sisters. (Doncha love siblings!?)

20. Who kissed who first? oooo. I think it was our 3rd date. I went to see him off home again and he said "I was hoping for a goodbye kiss actually". So he got a chaste peck. But they soon developed into rather more than pecks. *giggle*

21. Who proposed? He did. On the top of One Tree Hill (while it still had a tree) on Waitangi Day 1999. I knew he was going to ask some time because he warned me, "One of these days I'm going to ask you to marry me, so you'd better have an answer ready." We went home and told my folks - my sisters went wild and my Mum rushed downstairs and wrapped up an engagement present she'd bought in anticipation! LOL! We rang his folks and they were pleased too. His sister took a bit of time to get over it though. She was a bit envious I think.

22. His best features and qualities? He's a gentle guy. The strong, silent type. He puts up a tough front sometimes but he is actually a big softie. He has a good sense of humour and we have some silly times together. He's intelligent. He can fix complicated electronic stuff. He is quite creative.

23. Tag some people. I’m tagging these people (if they feel like it and have the time):

Rachel
Heather
Em
Sarah (only if she wants to since she's just had her first baby)

Flaunt it Friday: Significant Others

themommykelly's, theme this week is the story of your meeting with your SO :-) I've enjoyed reading other participants stories... here is ours.

I met DH when I was 25. I've blogged about our first date earlier this year . I'd been working for 3-4 years, and had been single for 4 of them. My previous relationship had burnt me a bit (as they usually do) and I was almost resigned to being a singleton. I wasn't opposed to meeting people, but it was difficult because I really wanted to marry within my faith... and that restricted the pool quite a bit! So after praying rather desperately I decided to just get on with life and not dwell on it. It was hard, because we live in a world that is oriented to coupledom. I didn't always succeed in having a serenity about it. But I tried to make some plans to give myself goals that kept my mind off it.

I knew DH sort of. He originally lived in Whangarei (2 hours away for overseas readers) but had moved to Auckland to study. Once he found a job he moved to our side of town and boarded with some close friends of ours in their small flat. So I knew who he was but didn't have much to do with him. He was and still is a shy person, and found it hard to socialise.

One day (after stewing about it for several weeks) he called and asked me out. You can read about that here! After our first date I invited him back in to meet the folks but he declined. Too shy! Things progressed slowly. I was afraid to commit to a relationship because of my fear of being hurt again and because I wanted to be sure that he was the "right" one. Asking him out was a big step for me, as opposed to accepting invitations to go out from him. I spent quite a few weeks in denial that I was having any sort of relationship.

Eventually I realised that I enjoyed his company and things started to advance more rapidly. We ended up spending our lunch hours together, our evenings together and weekends too. Western Springs was a favourite place to have a lunchtime pash. LOL!

In fact, having to be apart got harder and harder as our feelings for each other grew. I was still living at home so DH often would arrive back at his flat at midnight much to the amusement of our mutual friends! He got breath tested several times on his many trips back home on Friday/Saturday nights but the only thing he would've scored positive for would've been "well kissed". :-)

Taking the risk to commit to marriage was a big step for both of us for reasons not appropriate to discuss on this blog. But suffice it to say we had several months of very stressful days before DH popped the question and I accepted. And so, the big day came, we got married and here we are now with 2 kids and yes, we're still in love.

We have had our moments of course! Both of us are excellent at sulking. We sometimes don't communicate very well. Neither of us is perfect and some of our foibles irritate the other. But over all our relationship has become stronger for which I am extremely grateful and feel very blessed. But that doesn't happen by chance and both of us are aware that this marriage thing requires attention. I don't want to take it for granted.

NB: Photo taken yesterday... we had some family photos taken for the Christmas cards, so expect a few more in the next few days.

7 years (I mean 8) of wedded bliss

8* years ago, DH and I vowed to love, cherish and honour each other before our God, family and friends.

Happy memories! Dh proposed to me on the top of One Tree Hill on Waitangi day 1999. I knew he was going to ask me because he'd told me he would ask some time and that I should have an answer ready. I just didn't know exactly when it would happen. I made him wait a few seconds just to be perverse but he knew what my answer would be anyway! LOL!

I was up at 6am getting ready for the big day. Wasn't nervous at all, just happy and hoping it would all go well.

DH on the other hand was not okay. Waiting to "go down the aisle" I asked the venue manager how he was... "He's a nervous wreck"! While we said our vows he was blinking back tears, and luckily his groomsman had a hanky because he'd forgotten one! It's a memory I cherish because DH isn't very good an expressing emotions in words. I didn't cry during the ceremony but I did during my Dad's speech. *sob*

7 years isn't that long really but it feels like it's always been this way... in a good way. So much has happened and we've weathered a few storms that have happened between us and around us.

I can't say I "renew" my vows each anniversary because I made that commitment once and intend to stick to my word. But it's good to reflect.

And if we can find a baby sitter we'll go out to tea tomorrow since DH had to go to Wellington today for work and has to stay the night.

And I'm such a dork because I'm timing this post to be published at the time of our ceremony!
*Edited to get the correct number of years!!! It's 8 Doh!

First date

Today is the anniversary of our (DH & mine) first date. As DD kicked beside me and DS bounced around on our bed this morning I commented that I hadn't foreseen this when I agreed to go out for dinner with him! :-)

His phone call was rather unexpected. I had been working for a while, and had various projects on the go. My last relationship had fizzled (a happy escape) some years before. While I hadn't given up hope of love 'n' marriage, I also had decided to make the most of single life. My sister and I were saving up to go on an OE together. One evening the phone rang and my youngest sister came into my room with a puzzled look on her face, "It's for you" she said, obviously wondering why some guy was calling me. A very nervous DH said,
"Hello, how's it going?"
Me: "ummm... fine" [*thinks* Who is this?]
DH: "It's Rodney here."
Me: "Oh! Hi!" [*thinks* Why are you calling me?]
DH: "I was wondering if you'd like to go out for dinner some time?"
Me: "Well..er..sure! When were you thinking of?" [*thinks* I'll give anyone at least one try]
DH: "Ummm... I hadn't decided that yet." [*thinks* Sh**! She said yes!!]
Me: "Okay - well when you've decided let me know" [*thinks* Poor guy!]
DH: "Okay - I call you"
Me: "Okay. . umm"
DH: "See you"
Me: "Bye"

I hung up the phone and turned around to see both my sisters waiting to know what it was about. No privacy in our house! LOL! The day came. My sisters were all agog of course. "Please will you let us pluck your eye brows?" they said.
He took me out to Valentines - not the most romantic venue but we were both kind of nervous so at least there was nothing unexpected about the menu.

So were there stars in our eyes and fireworks in the air? No. I can't say that there was a magical pixie pointing at him saying "He's the one!" What we did have was animated conversation and by the end of the evening we had discovered quite a bit in common. We both felt "comfortable" with each other and decided we'd date again.

Eventually, there was an another entry in my diary.
And my sister went on an OE by herself. ;-)